Fibromyalgia Poems

When Illness Makes You Feel Stupid

Before I became ill I was quite intelligent and independent

I could complete tasks by myself easily and on time

I would remember everything and took pride in my work

I never had to ask someone to repeat anything, I just got on with it

However now everyday I feel utterly stupid

I have to ask multiple times as I forget what I’m doing or how to do it

Some days I’m in a daze and feel useless to the world

Conversations go straight over my head and I’m just not there

Lack of sleep makes things even worse

But even with sleep I’m a walking zombie, almost brainless

I feel like others judge me thinking I’m slow when really I’m ill

I’m trying my best to keep up but I have to go at my own pace

When the pain is at its worst my brain switches off completely

I stare at nothing and the day goes by without even noticing

On these days my thoughts are so jumbled I can’t even form a sentence

You don’t see those days, I hide them from even myself

The most awful thing about it is that there isn’t much that helps

I write everything down as when I’m stuck I can look back at it

But remembering to write it down is sometimes a feat in itself

We do what we can to help us maintain some kind of normalcy

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1 thought on “When Illness Makes You Feel Stupid”

  1. I rely on lists and to-do lists for my floundering memory, and avoid emails and conversations when my brain simply can’t function to form coherent thoughts and sentences. You’ve captured this so well.
    Caz xx


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