Showing the Pain

I find it very hard to express the pain I’m feeling or anything about my illness, to be honest

I feel like people will judge me, think I’m playing on it for effect or for sympathy

I find myself staying silent about it all. It’s the only way I can get away from the guilt

I lock it away inside of me and throw away the key. It only resurfaces when it’s really bad

When it gets that bad I lock myself away instead. Stay in bed away from the world

People find it hard to believe, that I could be in so much pain 24/7, but it’s true

I know it’s hard for others to understand. I’ve been the judging person on the other side

But now I know the pain, I understand. Only those who also suffer know the pain

I don’t mind people not understanding, but please be there to listen and be a friend

Ask if I’m alright if you want, but I will never be completely honest

I will reply I’m alive when I’m feeling my worst. It’s easier than explaining

I will reply I’m okay when really I’m not, but it’s just too much effort to admit to myself

Please look out for those signs that say I’m not doing too good. Please just be there for me